Just a vent because I'm not talking about this to anybody, but as the title says, whenever its a bad day I like to go to the park, it's a park that i grew up with going to in elementary school, it helps me think of so many good memories that have come and passed. I typically think about how I wish I could be this happy and innocent when I was younger. I only told one person about my sneaking off but I modified it by saying I go there to meditate and feel better on my own. I haven't told anyone about my suicidal tendencies or anything, it isn't there business and I don't want them involved. It's why I go online, none of y'all know me and i don't really care because no one will know me. And I want it to be that way. I want to choke/hang myself when no one knows I'm gone and I won't be disturbed. But I can't find the guts to do it because every time I try I stop myself because I'm a goddamn failure even at ending my life! If anyone can give me encouragement then that'd help.