What’s wrong with me
For so many years, I’ve been guarding myself so much. I’ve put my heart out there to so many. Friends, family, and boyfriends. I’ve gotten hurt so bad. So finally I just put up a front. Ive had this hard outer shell that nobody could get through. Finally, a few days ago I was able to put my heart out there again. I’m so proud of myself but I’m effing terrified. I want to feel loved. I want to be able to love. But I don’t know how. I have so much love to give and it’s kinda like I’ve been storing it up for years, guarding it. I don’t want anyone to hurt it. Someone please just show me how. I desperately just want to be able to open up to someone. I want to be able to have that complete trust in someone that they won’t hurt my heart. Here I am, after so many years of guarding myself I’m ready to love. I just want to feel that love and someone to hold me and tell me that everything is going to be alright. I don’t want to be hurt.
I met someone today and I have no idea how or why. But just something he said ripped that guard I have up. I don’t even know his name. I wish I did. It was so weird, it felt like I had an instant connection with him. I’m probly just making it up in my mind. But here I am bawling my eyes out because I just want to be loved. Why did he have to go do that.
Posted Dec 11, 2018 18:04 by anonymous
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