So im from a Indian family, We grew up in the west though. But growing up we had to remain "very Indian" strict parents that wouldn't allow me to do anything.

From around age 12 ive been "forced to" help out in whatever work my parents do. While my older sister was allowed to do whatever she wanted to do, because she would use her sport as an excuse. And also because she managed to escape this place when she turned 18 and could move out while i was stuck there having to "help out the family". My dad would hit me and break my shit if i wanted to sleep in and rest at age 13-17, that i walked too slow and that i wasn't enthusiastic when working. (Really created a want to defy him in me in adult age as well. and didn't help my depression). I got out for a couple of years to go to university but moved back when my parents needed help and i was in between work. Eventually my parents became very rich and my sister helped manage the business from overseas while i would have to remain at the house to help them out as my dad was cheap and didn't want to pay others for work he could do himself ( or get me to do ). Adult age me feeling bad for them as they were aging and needed help, and wanting to help them out decided to forego my own career interests for the moment ( i still worked on my own company after working for my father ) by spending 4/5 years just working with my dad, helping him with his work whenever he needed it. I got to live at home rent free ( i cooked cleaned and took care of myself always have), and worked on my stuff afterwards.

Example of a weekday for me : work on my stuff from 9/10-12, then from 12-6/7 i would help my dad, and then from 8-12/3am i would work on my stuff again in between resting. That would be my week 5/6 days out of the week.

Eventually it just went too long, i was stuck in a pattern of self-depression and had to get out. I talked with my sister and she said she would move back in a year or so. That i could leave if i wanted to. My parents kept telling me to get a loan and they would cosign and pay the deposit on my house. ( you would think they were being nice? No they couldnt buy anymore properties under their names anymore) I refused every-time as i didn't need a house. (they were also trying to get me to stay near them by buying a house near them and then having me be responsible to fix it up and rent it out) and i knew they were using it as a means to manipulate me. I ended up managing to leave to another country and live a pretty decent life the last year.

Anyways fast forward to present day.

Its been about 1,5 years since i moved out. My parents are hounding me to get married. I do not want to or feel ready ( i am 34), i feel like my life was on hold for over the last 5 years and want to enjoy as much as possible.

My sister called up up a couple of days ago and told me that my parents are thinking about adding a will that says i need to essentially do what they want before i get anything. I laughed because i knew it would come to this. Which is why from the getgo i have always said i dont need them to buy me a house. I mean if they want to give her everything then its their choice. But its fucking shitty considering all the work i did for them.

Which is the main point of this AITA.

I called my father up to say "hi hello" and he basically yelled at me for not wanting to settle down and still not making enough money that they want me to be making. He kept going back to trying to bribe me in a way, like saying "well come in January and buy you a house there ok, just settle down..

I tried to explain i didn't need a house and then i got mad and told them about how i knew about the will. And it got a bit heated, nothing too loud.

Essentially my point was :

* Ive worked for him without getting any salary or pay for over 5 years breaking my back kind of work hard labor type of work. I didn't ask for money still, i even worked on my own stuff in between. When i left i was given 80-100 dollars. Yeah. Thats my goodbye gift from my parents (at that time they were worth: 10-12m). They were crying when i left. (But it felt like they were crying because they lost someone to work for them take care of them and their tech/wifi issues.) Ive lived by myself for a while now, and im finally starting to get happy. I mean because i run my own company i have moments where i have to wait for the client to pay and such but essentially i am making well enough money ( i just been spending too much over the last year ) and needed a loan from my sister.

So i told him that and that instead of always saying you will buy me a house how about you give me financial help for working for you guys over those 5 years. I told him that i dont need their money but if they want to give me money they can do it when i needed it not in some future time where i dont even know where i am going to buy a house or what kind of person im buying it with.

Then his point was:

* That other children work for their families too. That every Indian child works for their parents. That they had paid my drivers licence classes and gave me 5k over those 3 years at university and paid 500 for my eyeglasses. They paid for my clothes and food when i was a child. They paid a couple of bills that were sent to my old address total 300-500 over the years. That i should stand on my own feet like my sister ( who has three incomes ( properties she invested in with my parents, her income and her husbands income ) 60K she got from my parents to buy her flat for her and her husband ) Oh also she never had to fucking lift anything or do any labor ever for those properties shes benefiting from.


So we just ended it there, and afterwards it made me feel bad. But i also see the absurdity in it. I think i might be the asshole here perhaps ? My sister thinks i need to "grow up" and get settled and married and get a 9 to 5 job. Im making decent pay in my company im just in between certain things that takes up time. I do keep pushing the time-frame though. But life gives me many cruveballs.