About a decade ago I was tasked with digging a hole in the yard to uncover the septic tank which had become backed up and would need to be drained. Finding the right spot and digging to the right depth to find the lid to the tank was a nightmare but when completed we called the...plumber? I don't know, the septic tank people who came and vacuum sucked the...contents...of the tank. When the technician completed the job he mentioned to my dad in front of me that the backup was likely do to a large number of "rubbers" being flushed down the toilet.

After the technician left my dad asked me not to tell my mom about the rubbers. He didn't say why and I didn't ask why not. I really didn't think anything of it. I knew my parents had sex (they have 8 kids) and I've seen their ridiculously large Costco sized box of condoms under the bathroom sink. I figured my dad was probably supposed to discard the used condoms in the trash and didn't want my mother to know his laziness had caused the tank to become blocked.

However I still think of this incident from time to time and wonder if my dad had other reasons for her not wanting to know? I can't imagine he'd cheat in our house (with 8 kids around) but the thought still nags me. I don't have any real reason to suspect this but I can't really think of any other justification for the "don't tell your mom" line.