I (18F) have been with my boyfriend (21M) for about 8 months. I was really into it the first little while in our relationship, until things started to get weird.

My boyfriend and I were in the "honey moon phase", I would sleep over at his house around 4x a week. But suddenly, that wasn't enough for him; I would stay the night then he would insist the next afternoon we go for coffee on his lunch break, even though I needed to get my own stuff done. He would get mad if I would cancel.

At his job he was able to be on his phone all day so he would be texting me almost all day on different platforms (Instagram, text and snapchat at the same time.) If I didn't answer him fast enough he'd call me out. He admitted to checking my snapchat location "when he was bored", but if I went on ghost mode he'd question me about it.

There have been 3 separate occasions where he randomly shows up to my house without letting me know, one time I woke up and he was just standing in my room with coffee. This wouldn't be a problem to me if I knew him a bit better, or if he respected my boundaries. The last time he randomly showed up I had told him that I didn't want to see him that day because I had to get classwork done before work, but he showed up with pizza and tried to guilt me by saying, " well I thought I was doing something nice..."

He admitted to being jealous of my friends when "I'm giving them attention and not him". I showed him a picture of my cousin and his baby because I was going to go see them and he called my cousin ugly, and then admitted later he was JEALOUS.

I don't like him anymore, every time I talk to him I feel annoyed. I feel like I'm walking on eggshells whenever I bring up a guys name or a friend that maybe he hasn't heard of because he has only known me for 8 fucking months.

I want to like him, I want to love him but I can't anymore. I feel like we don't even like the same things, he isn't as ambitious as I am. When we have conversations he barely has anything to talk about because he's just an all around neutral person and doesn't care about much. I feel like he's holding me back from what I could achieve academically because I feel like every choice I make has to be one that is with him.

I'm not even sexually attracted to him anymore because whenever we're in the bedroom he talks to me in baby voice or he makes weird fucking noises and faces. He expects me to go down on him but when he goes down on me he'll whine and make grossed out faces. He could suffice with a simple, " I don't like going down" but instead he'll "be truthfully honest" and just straight up be a dick. He will last for maybe a minute or so and I have tried for so long to be okay and accommodating, but after he finishes he will just say "sorry" or he'll hand me a vibrator and tell me to go into the bathroom.

I really want to love him again but I physically cannot. I want to break up with him but deep down I'm so fucking scared of being alone and I've already put 8 months into this relationship. I wish there was an easier way.