I’m on mobile so please forgive my weird format.

Tl;dr: I want to run away but I don’t want to.

I like to think I’ve lived a pretty ok life. I get along well with my family as much as anyone could, I have great friends and I’ve been with my girlfriend around 10 years and have a fairly decent job I don’t get payed much but it’s enough to get the bills payed.

But I’ve always had this feeling that when I get a license I’m just gonna hop in a car and just drive off to somewhere else and just disappear. Even if I have to go in a car just to grab something I’ll sit in the drivers seat for a few moments and just contemplate taking it and going away.

I don’t really have any dreams or plans of my future I’ve always just gone along with the flow of things which I know isn’t good and I don’t really have anything tying me down where I live besides my girlfriend and my family, and I know it would destroy them if I ever did that.

But I really don’t want to do that. Like I said I’ve lived a ok life I love my friends and family and don’t want to hurt them I just don’t know what to do.

Sorry for rambling I just need to get this off my chest since I don’t have anyone to tell all this.