So, I have this friend since I was a teenager. I guess we know each other for more than 20 years. While I basically met every girlfriend and affair he had, picked him up when he was dumped (sometimes I guess he had deserved it, sometimes not), he now has a new girlfriend and thinks it's okay to tell me that he fucks her twice every evening.

Why am I so angry about this? Because I don't have a sex life and he is very well aware of that, as I came out as being pedophile more than 15 years ago to him and most of my friends.

Seriously, I am thinking about buying pink paint and smother it all over his car if he doesn't shut up any time soon!