My dad may have Borderline Personality Disorder after discussing my experiences with him with my therapist. It wasn't always difficult and he was a great dad at times but was for a period extremely inconsistent with his moods, which negatively affected his treatment of me. This is what I've written: "Dear Dad- Happy Late Father's Day. I realised I never wrote you this father's day card, and to contrast previous years I'll write something non-generic. I know that you have been able to tell that there has been a strain on our relationship over the past couple of years, this is due to the anger I've internalised towards you due to the pressure you placed on me to succeed and excel in mainly my teenage years, as well as your pattern of being overly reactive to things I say and do. Firstly, I want to emphasise that I know this comes from a place of love and caring- to better me and to push me towards my potential. Though, some of these expectations have resulted in me having some anxiety, in regards to how I would perform in sport, but mainly in academics and in my career. This initial anxiety turned into resentment. There were times when you were too harsh, catastrophizing situations that weren't as bad as you perceived. Yet, I know you were trying to do what you thought was best for me. Unfortunately, in trying to come so close, and by trying to be in control, it resulted in you slowly pushing me away. There has been a plethora of good times that we have shared over the years, and I've always appreciated you as a man and as a father. When I counter you, it's because I disagree with you on a particular topic, not because I do not respect you. My poor mental health at times over the past 20 months wasn't due to you, but our obvious tension, and your tendency to emotionally overreact prevented me from being more honest and transparent with you- to the best ability a 20-year old can be with their parents. I want this to change, though it will take efforts of self-improvement on your side too. I'm neither angry now, nor accusing you of being 'bad', but the first and main step is to try and control your reactions, so that I feel comfortable coming to you, because I do want your non-emotionally charged advice. I have had a problem with my moods in the past, and I know you may have as well. It's okay to be anxious, depressed or angry. But it is not okay to take those strong emotions out on me or mum: this is coming off like an accusation, but I want to just express how I feel, about thoughts that have developed since I was younger. I know you're at heart a true family man, a good man, an intelligent man. Hence, it is upsetting to feel as if I don't always get to see, experience, enjoy that side of you. Life is short, there may not be a God, the universe is an uncaring void; yet we are blessed with life and at the core of that are our interpersonal connections and relationships. That is what truly matters. Not being popular amongst dickheads, not money, not prestige. Let's not dwell on the past, but smile optimistically at what lies ahead... With Love your Son xx." I'm not sure if I'll give it to him yet.