So my step dad was a terrible human being. I had vague memories of sexual things at a young age. I always assumed it was him. I had snippets.

Well a few weeks ago my mother got some pictures developed and pictures of him were in there. Pictures of me and him. Pictures of me naked with him clothed.

She made me promise not to tell my dad she had the pictures as he hates my step dad and "she just doesn't understand why"

I told my mom when I was 12 what he did to me. She basically called me a liar. (he also stabbed her and tried to strangle her and she had a restraining order on him but I was a liar)

Over the last few years I've gotten her to admit to walking in on him and I when I was about 4. I was naked fully in bed he was clothed. She said she assumed I took my clothes off. I was 4. He was like 37.

When I was 6 I was in the tub with her friends daughter playing with bubbles. I made a bubble penis and thought it was funny. My mom's friend was very worried how I knew what it was and asked my mom. She played it off as I must have saw step dads penis while he was peeing at some point.

The other day my fiance made a joke (same day I saw pictures first time I've seen him since I was 8) about rape while being physically sexual with me. I had a full break down. For like 2 hours. I was getting full flash backs. Where there had only been guesses and snippets suddenly I had entire memories. As in I can remember the posters on my wall behind his damned face.

Since then I am having a hard time even being around my mother. I am not coping well and I honestly don't know what to do at this point. It happened to me like 15 years ago. Yet because of those memories I feel like it happened last month.

I don't even know what I'm confessing other than that I now have proff I was raped. That my mother knew and never did anything. That the minuet she's done helping me with my wedding I may cut her out of my life. That if I EVER have a child she will never even so much as be in the room alone with it.


INFO: dad got sent to prison before my 1st bday. Mom got with step dad not married for about 6 years. Then he started abusing her so she left him. Dad got out of prison and they are together. My dad knows and wanted to kill this man. This man is dead.