I don't even know if this is all that nad, but maybe some people will have fun thinking or even talking to me about this

I am VERY into pet play. A sorta BDSM thing, sorta like being a little, but obviously more animal based, and I've been this way since I was like.. 12. I wasn't raped or anything, I just.. was exposed to the concept through media, and happily latched onto it. It fits me really well, but still, my analytical side wonders if this is just an unhealthy coping mechanism to fufill the fact I wasn't shown much affection when growing up.. I wonder if my adoration of being shown the slightest bit of affection or appreciation comes from crippling self doubt and such? In the moment, I of course love it, and I don't show any major signs of addiction, but it still feels odd

TLDR: I love sex and cuddling, and I'm worried if it's because I've been neglected mentally during my younger years

22 Now by the way for some context