I tricked my sister into getting pregnant
My very smart sister has gone from grad school to barefoot and pregnant mombiehood in just a couple of years. Her oldest is just 4 and she has a fourth baby on the way at age 26.
She does not even try to use birth control any more and has really let herself go. It has been years since I have seen her use makeup or wear anything that isn’t a maternity dress.
This is mostly my fault. Here is the background.
My DH [38] and I [39] were one and done after our first child [6] when I was 34. DH got a vasectomy right after I gave birth, but we never told my family because we did not want to put up with any BS. Then the next year after our kid was born our middle sister had a cancer scare and had a hysterectomy. It was her fertility specialist whom found the cancer — she and her husband had put off having kids, but she was lucky just to be alive.
That happened the same year out baby sister [now 26] was getting married. She was just finishing college, and she and her husband were going into long grad school programs where babies were just not an option for her. They were saying child freer or at least delay until their mid 30s.
Well, my sister ended up pregnant just three months after her wedding and then no 2 was conceived just six months after his older sister was born.
Those two “accidents” persuaded little sis to drop out of school and give up on birth control. At first she was really upset and had a pretty bad bout of depression, but then she accepted that it was just one of those curve balls life throws you and that it was “meant to be.”
She is now a committed mombie and pregnant with no 4 while still nursing no 3. She seems adjusted to her new life, and to be honest it is nice to have some grandkids and nieces and a nephew in the family.
The reality is that it wasn’t just “meant to be.” The first two weren’t accidents — I set up her and her husband to have unprotected sex — but it has been really weird to see how she adjusted her whole outlook on life to accommodate these two surprises. I knew my middle sister regretted not having kids, and to be honest I sometimes had second thoughts about my DH getting snipped, so I decided I had to intervene to help my little sister.
For the first baby, I bought her an expensive fertility monitor and a matching one for me so we could track our cycles together. When I knew she was going to be ovulating, I invited myself over and made sure she got completely wasted by spiking her food with cannibis oil and pouring drinks down her. I made sure their condom box was empty and showed her husband my fertility monitor pretending it was hers to persuade him to do her unprotected while she was passed out.
For number two, I convinced her to go on the Nuva Ring and then made sure her entire three month supply got nice and toasty warm for hours in her clothes dryer before she ever popped in the first one. She was pregnant again just six months after giving birth.
She had a free ride to a top grad school program, and now she is literally a barefoot stay at home mom with three under 4 and a fourth on the way and plans for more. It just goes to show you that women can change their minds.
But I never imagined my sister would go so overboard that she would give up birth control entirely and just make as many babies as come naturally. She is really smart — the smartest of all the kids in our family.
Should I try to get her out of this endless loop of more babies, or just let her enjoy her new life that she seems to have accepted?
Not to make excuses, but It was a pretty crazy time for me to have our sister almost die from cancer and have a hysterectomy without ever having kids and then the same year have little sis graduate from college and get married and announce she intended to travel to the other side of the world for school. And it was just the year prior that I had given birth, gone through maternity leave and going back to work, and my husband’s vasectomy, with me having second thoughts. All of it just really messed with my head. At first I felt a real sense of accomplishment for actually making my plan work — and that’s why I just couldn't help myself and had to do it a second time — but now I am feeling guilty.
Posted Jan 30, 2019 18:05 by anonymous
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