It's kind of a long story, but it's a good one and I hope it makes you laugh.

We got to Vegas about 1.5 days before day one of EDC. After getting settled in my friend and I thought it would be a good idea to eat an eight of some magical mushrooms I had brought along. Now that is a pretty good serving and my username suited me very while during the next 12 hours. I got separated from my friend and went on a wild journey alone walking down the strip to Vegas. I even almost got a hooker and followed her halfway to a random hotel room before realizing it's the drugs and sober me would never do anything like be involved in prostitution so I apologized to the lady and left. The whole world was swaying almost like a cartoon and life was great. About 5 hours into my trip I find a guy from our group being almost violent with his girlfriend. I try to stop the argument and the guy proceeds to run down the strip with his girlfriend running after him. At this point my other mushroom friend joins me out of nowhere and we proceed to chase our angry and drunk friend down the strip. This is too much for me physically so I am throwing up some weird green gunks with bits of mushrooms in it but I keep running. Eventually the couple calms down and are best lovers again. We go back to the casino and I sit down for some blackjack while my other mushroom friend goes to play some poker.

I'm having a great time at the blackjack table and I'm up like $500 with only $200 of my own money in. I am getting beer after beer after beer. I realize its morning but I'm having too much fun and I'm winning and the people are great so I keep playing. There was a point during a hand where I realized I had to fart. My drunk and shrooming ass even stands up to let it out. As soon as I push I realize I made a mistake. It's not much but I can feel the warm mushy feeling. The feeling that makes the blood drop from your face. I am in the middle of a deal so it's not like I could just leave. I finish the hand as quickly as possible and ask the dealer if it's ok if I go to the restroom as she watches my chips. She agrees so I get up to go to my hotel room on the 16th floor. I am wearing these white swim shorts so I know that anyone behind me can see. I go up the elevator, wipe my butt with some dry toilet papers, throw my dirty shorts in some dark corner under the desk in the room, throw on some other slightly cleaner pairs, run back down to the table, and play a few more hours.

After that I went into the pool. I realize now how disgusting this is and hey, these confessions are not supposed to be nice and clean. After the pool we ate and I took a nap and it was day 1 of EDC. It was a good time and I'll never forget my experience.