I’m 19. I just applied for my first apartment and I’m scared shitless. I’m also testing for the apprenticeship program at my local union on the 7th of June. I moved states by myself after my breakup and am here alone learning to do new things by myself.

My mother and I don’t really have a relationship. She was never involved much in my life and most of it was left to my dad to handle. He is a drinker and kicked me out during my relationship with my ex and now lives only with my younger brother.

I feel I truly have no one anymore. But after I was kicked out during our relationship my ex’s mom helped me by loaning her car to me and was always the cement that filled the hole in my relationship with my own mother. I just want my family to be proud of me. I wish I could even tell my ex about what I’ve been able to do when I thought I couldn’t. I feel I lose my dignity from time to time when I call her mom and need to lean on her. I always apologize and say if I could call my own I would but I just don’t know who else to call. She always reassures me it’s okay and still thinks of me as a son. She says she is proud of me. And it makes me cry. I feel like such a loser I cannot lean on my own family. I do not reach out more than maybe once a month (it’s been 3 months since breakup) and she always keeps our conversations private because she knows I need to just talk. I’m slowly getting the strength to completely let go and not contact her but it’s so hard. She really was a great mother figure. Breakups are not just hard between the dumper and dumpee, but losing their family too.

Please wish me luck on these steps I’m taking towards moving on/bettering myself. It would mean a lot. Thx :)