I caught a really aggressive flu that's going through my entire household and I had to call out sick from the office I work at today. I haven't had to do this before. I feel like I'm already in poor standing with my boss because I'm a newbie and I fuck everything up a lot. My anxiety is through the roof right now.

I not only feel incredibly guilty for doing it, but I feel like this just reflects terribly on me and I'm going to get told off or scolded or whatever. But I mean. Fuck, I'm really sick. I was in so much pain over the weekend and like. Whatever this is, it's aggressively contagious with the way it's spread to everyone I've as much as sat in the same room as over the last two days.

Anyway, I know that this anxiety is partly irrational, but I'm in the probationary period where I could be fired for whatever reason my boss decides if he wants. I really like my job, I just fucking suck at it because I'm only a month in and had no prior education for the type of job it is, tbh. It's a completely different field from what I've ever been in and I'm sorry, I just fucking suck, but I won't always suck.

But now I feel like I'm not going to ever get to prove that because I had to call out sick and I'm just going to look like a lazy employee who also just fucking sucks.

Anyway, I'm stressed enough from being sick, how's your Monday going