I've dated and sex with four women in my 26-year life. Half have given me STDs.

My first STD was molluscum contagiosum from my first partner. To the ignorant, like I was, your first thought is herpes. Red bumps scattered among prickling pubes. They're rupturable, but you have to pinch and pull them with the tips of your nails like tweezer, then out comes a fleshy pearl like a dissatisfying pimple. My dermatologist, a young Indian-American with glasses, burned and beheaded a few to take a sample. The nurse, whom I remember being attractive in a tight-nosed silent way, stood by staring at my soft, uncircumsized, and shriveled dick while I laid in a plastic garb staring at the ceiling. The embarrassment was less about the STD than my cold, frightened penis being moved aside by two latex wrapped fingers with a pinch and toss. The doctor gave me paste, something like a strong acne cream that only worked if I popped the inflamed buggers. I dated that girlfriend on and off for another 4 years even though a year before my pleasant, horizontal exposé she had Gonorrhea but didn't tell me until the post-coital cigarette. It never manifested.

The second was chlamydia, the drip, from the second girl I dated. It was months into the relationship that I felt the burning when I pissed. I thought the drip was precum from me being excitable, but I quickly knew there is no way I'm that excitable if my boner falls during sex. Ignorant me thought that I could out last it, but it persisted. I had it for a month or two before I accepted something was wrong.

It was summer, I was home visiting my family while my girlfriend was in South Padre with her's. My mother, brother, and I were driving home from shopping when, from the backseat, I said, I think I need to go to the doctor. My mother asked why, to which I replied, it burns when I pee, I think I have an STD. She looked back at me with a straight face, then laughed, but my brother's laughter didn't hesitate. It burst out like one of my molluscm pearls; though, without any pressure needing to be applied. My mother said to wrap it, and not to tell my father because he'd judge my girlfriend - my mother liked her. We dropped off my brother at the house and headed to an HEB with an in-store clinic. While my mother waited in the car, I sat next to a checkout counter waiting to be called back with a drippy dick watching people buy chips and dip. A mother walked out of the single room in the clinic holding her adolescent son's hand. I could only wish my drip came from my nose rather than down under. The clinician brought me back into the closet-sized room, I described my burning sensation and drip, and she asked me to drop my pants and roll back my foreskin, I did. She said it's Chlamydia or Gonorrhea. Either way she'd me for both, a shot in the ass with a fat needle and a pill the size of my testicle. This STD-treatment was less shameful than the first since I'd made a round before.

I called my girlfriend and told her. She asked if I cheated on her or if I got it from my ex. I said no, I was certain it was her, then asked her the same question. It wasn't until a month later that she told me she'd had a threesome with a frat dude and her friend the week before we started dating. My money was on that until 4 months later I got the god damn drip again. We were broken up at that point and she was back with her ex. My guess is she cheated, and I wasn't even fortunate enough to be a knowing and willing cuck, I just caught the byproduct.