My brother-in-law called me(28f) yesterday to vent to me, as he often does. But because of what I told him about a conversation my niece (24f) and I had months ago, he blew up at my sister afterwards. They apparently had a big fight and he threatened divorce.

Then, my niece called me last night and confronted me about it. And proceeded to tell me that I don’t know the whole story and basically insinuated that he has done something inappropriate to her somehow or has hurt her somehow. But she wouldn’t tell me the details. So I’m left to try filling in the blanks.

About my niece: It’s a long story but basically, she doesn’t seem to want move out or get a steady job. She doesn’t contribute financially and, according to him, doesn’t even help out around the house. She is 24 but she does have a childish mentality because she is extremely sheltered. And she is incredibly lazy.

Apparently, whatever happened (if it happened), it happened when she was 16! And it’s not that I don’t believe her, but she wouldn’t tell me, so I don’t know. And I hate to say it but I really wouldn’t put it past her to just being dramatic or even kind of lying or stretching the truth. She’s childish. And she seems innocent. But I’ve always known she has a darker side to her. She’s made me nervous in the past. So she could be trying to get rid of my brother in law by making this up.

About my BIL: He’s tired of the burden it’s putting on him to provide for a grown woman. And the stress it brings on the marriage. He is not my niece’s biological father. And my sister tends to take her daughter’s side and make excuses for her.

He’s a combat vet, ex marine and ex firefighter. He has two children with my sister now. 1 boy who is 8 years old and 1 girl who just turned one years old. He has PTSD, was a sex addict when he was younger and had an allegation against him in the past about raping an escort/stripper that was dismissed. He’s also really poor with money and spends more than he should. But I’ve never doubted that he was a good man with a good heart and a lot of love for my niece despite her not being his own flesh and blood.

About me: In my early twenties I was kicked out of my house because of my step dad and I butting heads. And my sister (who has also clashed in the past with my step dad) and my brother in law took me in and I stay with them. I lived with them for a year. I’ve always been close to my sister, even thought she was my second mother when I was a baby. And really close with my niece, who is kind of like another younger sister to me. And in that year I became really close to my BIL and he’s helped mentor me when I was at a loss and restored my faith in fathers and in men. I enlisted in the Coast Guard because of him and I asked him to be there at my graduation ceremony from basic training.

Tldr:

Either my niece is crying wolf and insinuating that my BIL sexually assaulted for God only knows why.

Or.

My brother in law, who I really look up to and is the only decent male family member that I have and the closest thing to a father figure that I have, sexually assaulted my niece when she was 16.